Four Point Plan

So my parents drove to New York this past weekend to help my sister move in. As they were leaving the city and driving through Pennsylvania, my father was surprised by how much of the state is wooded. Apparently the next though after this one was, what if he met up with a bear? And the next thought was that he could totally take a bear if he had a good plan. Daddy would later confess that he may have been a little delusional from the 5-Hour Energy he had just drunk when he came up with this plan. It's a four point plan. The bear will rise up one his hind legs with it's paws raised and Daddy would quickly stab in it in one paw, swiftly followed by the other (parts 1 and 2). While the bear is distracted and in pain, he would dart in and slit it's throat, followed by stabbing it in the heart ( parts 3 and 4). Needless to say, when I heard this plan, I just about peed my pants and I laughed until my stomach hurt. My family and I were then saddened to realize that Daddy was one day going to die after getting eaten by a bear.