2.15.2015

The Best Things About Being Less Fat On An Airplane

Flying is so much more comfortable minus 60lbs. I decided to catalogue the benefits on this last flight.

1) I can buckle my seat belt. With room left over. Seriously, a year ago, I was definitely in danger of asking for an extender. Pretty sure my life would have been over.

2) I'm not touching my neighbor. I hate rubbing up against randos. Can I tell you this 100lbs man once asked me if I could move over some? Clearly not, motherfucker. And you're 100lbs! Slide your tiny ass over. 

3) I can cross my legs. This is actually a general weight loss benefit. But so much more satisfying within the confines of a plane. 

4) My belly and thunder thighs don't touch the tray table when it's down. (I hope when it's down. If they were touching while it was up, I had bigger problems. Literally.) So much room! I don't feel Iike a sardine! So glorious! 

In conclusion, don't be fat. It kinda sucks. 

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