Resolution Time!!!!

Sorry I'm a few... months late. Let's say since it took me longer to make them, the odds of me sticking to them are better. Yeah...let's say that. I'd like to say I'll set more attainable goals this year, but I make no promises. Let's start with a review of last year's goals. They were as follows: 1) embrace my meanness 2) pull the race card constantly, 3) reduce my debt, 4) complete various home projects, and 5) get less fat. I think it's safe to say the only goal I attained was #1. I am nothing nice.
We're actually gonna shoot for some positive changes this year. I know, right!!

1. Stop swearing so much. By the way, Carlos is to blame for all the swearing I do now. But I'm gonna be the bigger person and rise above my salty language. I'm still allowed to use off-color words though. I wouldn't survive if I couldn't yell out "Balls!" every so often. Or call someone a dick face.  
2. Stop being so judgmental/stop offering my unsolicited opinion. I am well aware of the fact that I can be annoying. I believe it's primarily due to these traits. Y'all may disagree (with why I'm annoying, not the fact that I am). We all know that I have strong opinions about things. That doesn't mean I have to be such a bitch about it all the time. Or so vocal. Now, don't expect me to say polite, nice, socially acceptable things. I'm just gonna keep my mouth shut.
3. Stop eating. Just stop entirely. I'm living off of diet pills and water this year. I'm ridiculously enormous and the fat has gotta go. Or I may just eat a healthier diet and exercise more. Meh, we'll see what the year brings.
4. Work on one of my deadly sins. Bob determined that I embody about six out of the seven. If you can believe it, I'm not greedy! Anyways, I'm shooting for vanity, even though it should probably be wrath or pride. I seriously look at myself in every reflective surface I encounter, even my cell phone screen. It's ridiculous. Oh, but before I'm less vain, I must say I'm very happy that Leslie noticed I whitened my teeth!! Made my day!!
5. Get all my home repairs done. Actually, I need to keep my house in ready to sell condition at all times. You never know when the perfect next house will come along. *sob*
6. Pay off my credit cards!!!!!!!!!!

I can actually think of a lot more. But here's where I'll start. Maybe I do an update in a few months, report where I am. Well, that's 2012, folks!!  I can do it!! Positive thinking!