God, I'm Gross

I'm pretty sure I peed this morning, didn't wash my hands, then flossed my teeth. 

Dear New Orleans,

I gained ten pounds, damaged my liver, got addicted to penny slots, saw more penises than expected and as many drag queens as I wanted. I'll totally be back!!

Sincerely, 

Erica 

Ugh

Pre-vacay grooming is the worst. People actually shave their entire legs all the time? To the knee is more than sufficient for everyday life. 

Grammar Nerd

Knock knock?
Who's there?
To.
To who?
To whom.

Hahahahahaha

I'm Just Saying

I was at the mall last weekend. And the women working in a store there just completely ignored my existence. It was otherwise empty, my cousin briefly made eye contact, then the two saleswomen continued with their personal conversation. There was no acknowledgment of me as a potential paying customer, at all. Now, I doubt they work on commission, so selling me something probably made no difference to them one way or another. But this brings up something I don't understand. Maybe this makes me cold and calculating or grasping, but I don't get people letting their personal beliefs/opinions get in the way of making that money. I don't know if these woman were being racist or just terrible employees, but even if they were racist, why would you let that stop you from doing your job? And all these stories you hear recently of bakers and wedding planners and so on refusing to provide service to gay couples? I'm sorry, if I was a florist and gay marriage became legal in my state, the only thing I'd say is "Cha-Ching!"

*Apparently I should pay attention to current events. I guess folks in Indiana don't agree with me*

Dear Chuck Tingle,

Why are you trying to kill me? Because of you, I continue to experience the phenomena of insta-tears. I see one of your new book titles and I completely bypass laughter and go from zero to sobbing. You're just too much.

Sincerely,

Erica

What inspired revisiting Chuck Tingle? Well, I've been keeping up since I discovered him. But his latest story..."Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt"? Took me over the edge again.

You Know You're A Nerd When...

You excitedly ask the librarian about the new device that they can stack books on to check them out all at once.