1.02.2011

New Year's Resolutions, 2011 Edition

I continue to make resolutions that I never achieve, but I guess that's part of the fun. I think I have five or six this year.
  1. Embrace my meanness. Every year I say I going to try to be nicer. Why? I love bringing the mean and I'm going to revel in it. I'm sure many of you are thinking, "Damn, this has been you not embracing meanness?"
  2. Pull the race card. Constantly. I'm gonna talk shit about race constantly. This mostly stems from me being sick of being the only black person at work. And, it sometimes feels like, in the city of Madison. Miss Diamond ain't playin' around this year.
  3. Reduce my debt. This is another reoccurring resolution. But I gotta work on getting these credit cards paid off. 2011 is the year of the super budget.
  4. Finish some home projects. Another epic fail of 2010. If I could even just get my guest room furnished, I'll be happy. But doubtful, due to budget restraints.
  5. And the number one, all time repeat resolution? Get less fat! This year has a twist, though. I've decided if I don't completely get to my goal weight this coming year, in 2012 I'm shooting for 300lbs. Bob told me that this goal would be more reasonable if I didn't make resolutions like 90 in '09.

2 comments:

SALT said...

Bring the mean! I support you. I also wish I could play the race card. I think that is why I am blind. Blindness is my crutch for everything. Here is to 2011 Miss Diamonds. I love your face (giant eyeballs and all).

Muah!

Megan said...

Are you going to petition that all non-black people shouldn't get holiday pay on Martin Luther King day?