12.13.2015

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This blog still exists?

8.20.2015

My Personality Test Results

You understand life, its difficulties, and problems.
Your imagination runs away from you at times, causing you to exaggerate.
You are impatient to get ahead in life.
You express yourself well and assert yourself openly.
You are reliable, honest, and others depend on you.
You resent orders, but if asked will respond cheerfully.
You thrive on admiration and praise. 
You set very high standards for yourself.
You have a natural talent for business matters.
You have a strong urge to develop along creative lines.
Your ample energy is used to good advantage. 
You like to travel a good deal for all sorts of reasons.

An old ass machine at State Fair determined these things based on my signature. For $3.  

8.03.2015

Nelson Understands Me

We know how I feel about dinosaurs. But more specifically, I think paleontology is beyond bogus. And Nelson described my feelings beautifully. 

"They are kinda just tossing a bunch of animal bones together. 'This dinosaur had wings, scales, was invisible, but was multicolored and lived under water and was 675 feet long.'"

Truth! Preach it! It's all a bunch of malarkey. 

7.22.2015

An Unconventional Love Story

I never thought I could feel this way. Who knew you were out there, waiting to make my life whole. You're always there for me, you never let me down, and I'm happiest when I'm with you. I can only hope to have this feeling for the rest of my life. So thank you, Wendy's. Your chicken nuggets with honey mustard sauce complete me. 

7.03.2015

Delayed Reaction Face

For some reason, I can hear the same song over and over again, and still completely miss all the inappropriate song lyrics. Last time I posted this, I was discussing an Enrique Iglesias song. Never knew "loving you" was actually "fucking you." Well, this time it's both Nelly and Macklemore that got me. Okay, so how have I never noticed Nelly saying,"if the head right, Nelly there every night"? Seriously, Erica, that song is 15 years old. Where have you been? So that made me a little oblivious. The Macklemore lyrics I missed lead me to believe I'm deaf for real. Have you listened to the words to "And We Danced"? I was scandalized, I tell you!! My delicate ears were burning! Apparently his dick is "big, long, pink, strong, and known to last all night long." Who knew? Everyone in the world but me. I gotta get out of my bubble more often. 

6.28.2015

Mini Rant

I hate when grown ass men go by double consonant, y names. You know what I'm talking about. Bobby, Tommy, Billy, Jimmy. Ugh, Johnny. Dude, y'all aren't ten. Lock it up. 

6.22.2015

Best Compliment Ever

Yesterday Megan, my twin, told me she felt safe in the car with me driving!! Huzzah!! Feeling pretty proud of myself.